Rap Kerfuffle

My brother recently instigated a "rap battle" of sorts between me and my friend Dr. Lou Tennant over Facebook. He stopped being my friend after about halfway through the sonnet at the end, so I guess I lost. Annotations will be explained at the bottom, because there's a lot that needs explaining. B: indicates my brother's messages, L: indicates Lou's messages, and H: indicates my messages.

B:

High rolla

Pussy Patrolla'

Bells so mad [1]

it'd make you sad

That's it

time to quit

can't rhyme for shit

Lines that I spit

ain't a fit

Like a man tit

In mah mit

H:

Bro steps into the fray

But his rhymes be gay

If he wants to see the light of day

He best pick a God and pray.

Bitch, I'm classically trained

I make it rain

Like kisses on my dick[2]

Hard as a brick

Every time I think of Sonic The Hedgehog[3]

L:

(This part was stolen from Pokemon Cypher)

Y'all tryin' to rhyme?

Get up out, whatchu doin?

Y'all some unown lames

Gen 2, alph ruins

(This part was original?)

You're an old rod,

I'm a super rod,

But I hit yo' girl with this good rod

H:

I am like unown

'Cuz I've got Hidden Powers

Have this water stone

Since you clearly need Showers[4]

Yo' rhymes be weak

Like Love ball: defective

While the words that I speak

are super effective.

B: Gold

H:

Silver, and crystal, too

No need to be Blue

L:

Wanna talk Pokemon? Don't step to me.

You can't win, there's no chance, see?

Wanna act big? Wanna play rough?

You putting me to me to sleep, like a Jigglypuff.

I'm tired of you. Better give it a rest.

Release those rhymes, if that's your best.

You got no flow, your shit's a bore.

Now that I'm asleep, lemme use snore.

H:

But now my final form Hast been revealed

The power of The Bard is now my own.

For centuries these skills were safely sealed

The power of my poems knocks men prone.

A fearful phantom of five feet arrives

Each step it takes, the beating of a heart

Its endless march has trampled many lives

A pain parade in which you now take part.

My verse is smooth like sinusoidal curves

I'll school your English, physics, and your math

To step to me, you must have quite the nerves

I am afraid I've frayed them with my wrath

I spit a flood in which a man could drown

An uncontested king, I wear the Crown

[1] Bells are the currency in Animal Crossing, which is what started this whole thing.

[2] Suffice it to say, this is a reference to a thing in which some person rained kisses upon another's dick. I'm not naming names.

[3] This is a reference to a Game Grumps thing. You can hear it in this song.

[4] Showers is the Japanese name for Vaporeon. This is a thing that my friends and I know.